The Brews of Antiquity

It's just after dawn at the Dogfish Head brewpub in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware, where the ambition for the morning is to resurrect an Egyptian ale whose recipe dates back thousands of years.

But will the za'atar - a potent Middle Eastern spice mixture redolent of oregano - clobber the soft, floral flavor of the chamomile? And what about the dried doum-palm fruit, which has been giving off a worrisome fungusy scent ever since it was dropped in a brandy snifter of hot water and sampled as a tea?

"I want Dr. Pat to try this," says Sam Calagione, Dogfish Head's founder, frowning into his glass.

At last, Patrick McGovern, a 66-year-old archaeologist, wanders into the little pub, an oddity among the hip young brewers in their sweat shirts and flannel. Proper to the point of primness, the University of Pennsylvania adjunct professor sports a crisp polo shirt, pressed khakis and well-tended loafers; his wire spectacles peek out from a blizzard of white hair and beard. But Calagione, grinning broadly, greets the dignified visitor like a treasured drinking buddy. Which, in a sense, he is.  {Read on}

After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF.

Image via Wikipedia

(Editor’s Note: The following blog appeared first on Cracked.com. To see it there, complete with welcome jab at Dr. Phil, click here. Below is the first part of the original submission. Link to Part Two can be found below. Reader feedback on brands that we may have missed is as welcome as a free round… almost):

For a booze-maker, giving your hooch the right name can mean success, even if you are hustling a product that could be put to better use in the gas tanks of a fuel-hungry nation. Malt liquors like Wild Irish Rose, Night Flight, and Schlitz fall into this category, but their respective names hearken to the splendor of the Irish countryside (or a prostitute in the Irish countryside named Rose, which is still not so bad), getting high in the evening/the adrenaline that comes from sprinting away from a crime scene, and, well, Schlitz doesn’t really signify anything but it seems like it would be a fine name to give one’s first-born son – “The proud parents are thrilled to welcome little Schlitz Rasmussen into the world”. Like putting a silk hat on a pig, it’s a way of sprucing up your product and fostering a loyalty that is completely divorced from product quality – in other words, the kind of loyalty that lasts.

Just as a catchy name with positive connotations can mean success for a product with “optimal serving conditions” listed as “best served in the general proximity of someone who drinks fast”, so too can a bad name sink the fortunes of a quality product. Many of the booze brand names below have been slapped onto products that judging by reports from beer and liquor snobs on the Internet sound pretty good, but we are not going to find out just how good because their names send us dangerously close to wanting to walk the line of sobriety. {Read on} & {Part 2}

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The Last Time I Walked Into Cholamandal Artists' Village, I Saw So Many Glass Bottles. Gah. So, This Is What It Was?!

Tito Ingenieri, a character from a city called Quilmes, about an hour south from Buenos Aires, has built a massive home made entirely from beer bottles and trash. And by massive, we mean...

By massive we mean 6 million bottles, which have been added to the home along 19 years (at least that's what he claims).

Even if the home doesn't look sleek or chic, we have to give the guy credit for the recycling. Because even though usually beer bottles in Argentina are returnable, Ingenieri takes abandoned and non-returnable bottles from the street and has neighbors saving bottles for him.

He's a famous character in Quilmes and has been subject of many interviews, though this video from Eco-Ideas.net has some impressive images of the whole home, which looks huge. {Read on}{Cholamandal Artists' Village}{Image}

Here we see two titans, neither of whom I know or remember, spraying each other with beer. I honestly have no idea who they are or whether this was part of some dark mating ritual or not.

Ah! an American who speaks American.

Image by Rev Stan via Flickr

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America,

Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as 'HILLBILLIES.' You must now refer to them as "APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS"

And furthermore

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a ' BREASTED AMERICAN.'

2. She is not 'EASY' - She is 'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'

3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a 'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.'

4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a 'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'

5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes ' VERBALLY REPETITIVE.'

6. She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a ' LOW COST PROVIDER.'

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a 'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'

2. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is ' OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'

3. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He ' INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'

4. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in 'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'

5. He does not act like a 'TOTAL BUTT' - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.'

6. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's 'REAR CLEAVAGE.'