Monday, June 27, 2011

Thank God you are God.

Dear God, why do you hate donkeys?
"Arabic Language" in the Arabic Al-B...Image via WikipediaDear God,

I used to read what is claimed to be your last holy book written in Arabic, the Quran, because Mullahs have told us, and still do, that Quran cannot be translated into any other language. Although prohibition against translation seems to be more of a theological matter rather than a translational issue, I believe it is more a political concern. The Islamic clergymen believe that Quran is your word, God, and if it is translated into another language, it then becomes the word of human beings. Accordingly, it may lose its authentic meaning and its sacred quality, and possibly convey wrong messages to naïve readers.

Even though I like the Arabic rhythm of Quranic verses for its soothing therapeutic effect, especially if they are chanted by a professional, what good does it do me to read something in a language that I do not understand? It wasn't until recently that your representatives on earth, the shamans of the 21st century, decided to allow a stand-alone translation of Quran into Farsi. I bought a copy and read it thoroughly.

I must tell you that even though you did a good job providing divine fatherly advice to likely believers and frightening disbelievers with the threat of hellfire on almost every page, when it comes to format and coherency, I don't think you did a good job. Forgive me for being so professorial, but if you were one of my students, you would lose quite a lot of points for using such an amateurish format.

Why do you jump so abruptly from one subject to another in almost every chapter? You even change the subject while you are changing the subject! You could have helped us understand your words better by just sticking to one subject at a time. Of course I understand the reason; your words were written based on proclamations by Prophet Muhammad, a man who had no formal education, and the various chapters were put together years after his death. It is not clear who decided what should be put where; it seems like different sections are put together on a first-revealed-first-included basis!

By the way, I am writing this because I need to know if you can divine answers to some of the questions I encountered after I studied your book. I read your book with an inquiring mind and a keen interest in understanding your words; but frankly, it created more ambiguity and bewilderment for me than clarification and enlightenment. Consequently, I do have some questions, if you don't mind:

I can't help conjecturing why you have sworn so many times throughout your book, at least 66 times according to Microsoft's word count. Swearing is not for you; it is for us common and flawed human beings. We need to swear in order to prove our innocence if we are accused of wrongdoing.  We swear to tell the truth and not cover up our misdeeds or justify our lies, or to prove claims that we cannot prove otherwise. But, thank God you are God; you are devoid of such earthly shortcomings. No one can accuse you of any wrong doing, so why do you have to swear so frequently? You have nothing to cover up; you don't lie; and you have absolute power to prove or reject anything you claim without resorting to the chicanery of swearing.  Additionally, you are not being inaugurated into a high political office.

And please, if you have to swear, please swear to something worthwhile, like yourself! Why do you have to swear to unlikely things such as the dark night, early morning, high sky, angels who extract human lives, and even to the verses of your own book? {Read on Iranian.com}